United Pentecostal Church International: The Apostles' Doctrine

Greetings one and all!  This is part five of my mini-series on the doctrine of the United Pentecostal Church International (UPCI).  I am trying to get to bed early for my 8am class tomorrow, so I am going to breeze through "The Apostles' Doctrine".  This section, found at http://www.upci.org/doctrine/apostles.asp, is a list of many words and what they correspond to in their doctrine along with supporting Bible verses.  I will touch on each of the 18 words briefly.


The Apostles' Doctrine


Before I do anything; prove that that Bible is useful in discovering truths and/or provides accurate information!!!!  Okay, now I can begin.

Forward

"With sincerity we pray that God will grant the reader grace to accept the truth as it is in Christ Jesus."

How does Jesus Christ lead anybody to truth? What types of evidence are there that the Jesus character of the Bible is relaying accurate information that is infallible?

Bible

Wow. "[Gives] a true history of the creation of heaven, earth, and humanity...". Where is this true history in the Bible? Please show me where heaven is. Granted, heaven may be supernatural or metaphorical, however this means there is no distinguishing heaven from being supernatural/metaphorical or nonexistent. In layman's terms, please describe the differences, that we can verify, between a supernatural unicorn and a nonexistent unicorn (trick question, there aren't any). The creation of the earth, as stated in the Bible is just plain wrong. In the Bible, the "light" (or the Sun) was created after the earth. Now, through modern science (a reliable method of discerning what is true and what is bullshit) we know that the Sun, in fact, predates the earth (i.e. there was light before earth). Humans are a product of evolution, like all human life. Creationism has not been demonstrated and has no place in science. I will move on for the sake of time.

God

"There is only one God (Deuteronomy 6:4). He is the creator of heaven and earth, and of all living beings. He has revealed Himself to humanity as the Father (Creator), in the son (Savior), and as the Holy Ghost (indwelling Spirit). "

Prove it.
Father

"God is a Spirit (John 4:24). He is the Eternal One, the Creator of all things, and the Father of all humanity by creation. He is the First and the Last, and beside Him there is no God (Isaiah 44:6). There was no God formed before Him; neither shall be there any after Him (Isaiah 43:10)."

Again, where is the evidence of this outside your Bible?
Son

"Jesus is the Son of God according to the flesh (Romans 1:3) and the very God Himself according to the Spirit (Matthew 1:23)."

So God made a spiritual copy of himself on earth, to "sacrifice" (not a real sacrifice; sign me up to be tortured and crucified if I get to be a god in three days) Himself, to Himself, to circumvent the rules that He created. Furthermore, He is omniscient and saw all of this coming. God is pretty twisted.
Holy Ghost

"The Holy Ghost is not a third person in the Godhead, but rather the Spirit of God (the Creator), the Spirit of the resurrected Christ. The Holy Ghost comes to dwell in the hearts and lives of everyone who believes and obeys the gospel, as the comforter, Sustainer, and keeper (John 14:16-26; Romans 8:9-11)."

Sin

"Sin is the transgression of the law, or commandments of God (I John 3:4). The guilt of sin has fallen upon all humanity from Adam until now (Romans 3:23). The wages of sin is eternal death (Romans 6:23; Revelation 20:14) to all those who refuse to accept salvation as set forth in the Word of God."

"Eternal" in "eternal death" is a little redundant. I'll do a post in the future about the ridiculous laws found in the Bible such as not being able to eat shellfish, wear clothes of two different fibers, etc. and maybe your views on how Christians determine what is sinful will change.
SalvationHuman don't need saving from anything. Humans aren't inherently sinful.
Water BaptismPutting your head in water is necessary to enter into the kingdom of God? Next you'll say that babbling is a sign of possession by a ghost-like figure.

Mode of Baptism

"Sprinkling, pouring, or infant baptism of any kind cannot be substantiated by the Word of God, but are only human traditions."

This made me laugh. There's actually a way to baptize somebody wrong in the eyes of these people.
Formula for BaptismBasically just says that Jesus' name must be used.

Baptism of Holy GhostSpeaking in Tongues is evidence that your spirit has been baptized.

TonguesOh. You do.

HolinessSee previous posts on the doctrine of the UPCI.

Divine HealingShow me one case in which God has healed somebody. The first place you go to when you are hurt is a hospital; not a church.
Second Coming of Christ
Still waiting after thousands of predictions and two millennia?

Resurrection

"There will be a resurrection of all the dead, both just and unjust."

So now they believe in zombies.


Judgment

Too bad there isn't an "I told you so moment" for atheists to tell theists after we all die.

Again, I realize that this is short as I am terribly busy. Please e-mail me at brbailey@umd.edu if you have any questions, comments, or just want to start a discussion. Or, if you prefer, leave a comment below if you wish to publicly humiliate me!People who "feel" the Holy Ghost, in my opinion, are being mislead by their dogma. I have no doubt that they feel something, however I believe it is akin to getting goosebumps when listening to a particular singer or eating something particularly delicious. Furthermore, even if there is a Holy Ghost, your personal anecdotes do not count as evidence. For example, there are living, breathing people today that claim they have been abducted by aliens (sometimes in entire groups) and seem to sincerely believe it. Do you accept their testimonies?